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Friday, August 8, 2008

The REAL Reason Nanci Pelosi Closed Congress

At the end of a congressional session, the speaker usually opens the door for the Members to give a short speech of their choosing. This year, Ms Pelosi didn't allow the speeches, instead she shut the mikes, turned off the TV Cameras and the lights and closed congress for five weeks. This sparked a still ongoing protest by the Republicans who feel that you shouldn't shut down Congress for a long vacation when Oil Prices are still over 4 buck a gallon and there is still no energy plan, in fact Ms Pelosi hasn't even allowed a discussion on drilling.

Have you ever thought that maybe the Speaker of the House is getting a bad rap? Just maybe she has a legitimate reason to take a five week vacation in the middle of the summer, while the rest of us are busting our butts, working overtime so we can afford enough gas to go the the supermarket and purchase a loaf of bread that is overpriced simply because she wont allow domestic oil drilling.

I thought long and hard and came up with some possible explanations for Ms Pelosi's Ill timed summer vacation.

  • She went to buy an air pressure gage for her tires. Lets face it , being the environmentalist that she is, I am sure once Obama made the suggestion about saving gas she probably want to rush to her nearest Walmart buy a gage and check her tires.
  • Personally Autographing each copy of her book that comes of the press. Let See Five weeks, 6 days a week, 30 total days. That means she will have to sign almost twenty copy's a day, you don't want the speaker of the house to get cramps in her hand.
  • Bret Farve. You notice that the closure of Congress coincided with Bret Farve showing up at Packer Training Camp. Ms Pelosi has been stalking the former Packers' Quarterback for years. In fact once Farve was traded she rushed to NY to meet him ate the airport (see picture on right).
  • American Idol Auditions. Simon, Paula and Randy are choosing new contestants. Ms Pelosi did not always want to be the Most Powerful woman in the world, she wants to win American Idol.
  • Hey The Olympics Are On. Look she hate China and wishes we would have boycotted the Olympics. But since we didn't and since they are on TV... Nancy wants to watch EVERY LAST SECOND. She set up a room with 5 TV sets in her house, and has locked herself in along with a months supply of cheetos and pretzels.
  • Face Lift. She is secretly having a face lift and needs the recovery time. YOU EVER SEE HOW SHE REALLY LOOKS? What a pubic servant !!! She is getting the operation for us. After all, WE have to look at her.
See there they are, all perfectly rational reasons for making the Congress close down. Are they true? Well they would have to be. After all, with all of the bad publicity, if she shut down the congress, just to stop the Republicans from making two minute speeches criticizing her for not allowing a vote on drilling, she would be pretty dumb now, wouldn't she?


Susan Duclos said...

I love it!!!

Stephen R. Maloney said...

Sammy, I think you should add that Nancy and her husband are worth roughly $100 million -- he brought $99.9 million to the relationship, and she brought her "winning smile." They need time to spend just the interest on that vast fortune, and it's easier to spend money in SF than in DC. Of course, with all those tens of millions she wonders why people are worried about spending four bucks on a gallon of gas.

steve maloney
ambridge, pa

CKAinRedStateUSA said...

Maybe she went to have that gelatinous mass encased in her skull regenerated?

Whatever, given that I commute about 750 miles weeky because of the employment situation where I live, every time I see a gas station and the prices up on the sign, I think of how much I believe we should impeach her. Of course, after taking out behind the proverbial woodshed for some intense counseling.

This crisis we the people now face indicates not just issues with oil, but a real constitutional one.

There are too many leftists and loons--with respect to loons--who have been elected to Congress, mostly as Democrats, and forgotten they're supposed to represent the will of the people, not vote their conscience, should they have one, should it contradict the majority.

They, and that includes the Democrats in my state, have given us all the one-finger salute.

And they've done it gleefully.

It's time someone broke that finger with the big electorate finger at the ballot box and throw them all out of office--ESPECIALLY those who really do appear to have become enemies of the people.

From what's been revealed, that's essentially the entire majority party's contingent in Congress, save a few Democrats who still understand that their continued privilege there comes by vote and will of the people.