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Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Politically Correct New Nick Names For The Washington Redskins


Washington DC council member David Grosso says the name Washington Redskins is “racist and derogatory,” and that “it’s time to make a change.”
Grosso says a majority of his fellow councilmembers have agreed to co-sponsor the nonbinding resolution.

The team’s nickname has been the subject of renewed debate in recent months. A group of Native Americans has launched a new court battle to deny the team federal trademark protection, which would essentially force a name change.

Grosso’s resolution suggests “Redtails” as a new nickname. He says it would honor the Tuskegee Airmen and allow the team to maintain its fight song and color scheme with a few minor changes.
REDTAILS? I'm sorry but that's no name for a football team.  Redtails connotes someone who's arse is sore because he got whupped.

If the DC City Council is so extremely PC that they want a name change maybe the team could pick one of these:
  • Thank God We're Not The NY Jets: OK a little long but it's a chant that should be heard in every NFL stadium. 
  • An Animal Name?  Many Pro-football teams have animal names, the Dolphins, Jaguars, Cougars, and Superbowl winner the Ravens.  How about an animal associated with the nation's capital such as The Lame Ducks.
  •  Washington D.C. is the seat of the federal government, other teams have taken their names from federal institutions such as the former baseball team the Senators.  Football is a sport with large menacing athletes, so perhaps they could adopt the name, The Bloated Bureaucracy.
  •  Since Washington DC is the center of American Politics, perhaps the team could take on a name related to politicians like The Hacks or The Spinners.
  •  Tampa Bay has the Buccaneers, Oakland has the Raiders, so I thought Washington have The Stealers, but that won't work because its too close to the Pittsburgh team. But how about The Taxers or even The Redistributors?
  • Baseball's Nationals took the name because D.C. is the capital of our country. Nationals seems a bit soft for a football team, at first I thought of The Constitutions, but realized that wont work because no one in DC knows what the Constitution is..but how bout something tougher such as Criminally Trespassing Aliens which avoids the anti-PC term illegal aliens and certainly sounds tough.
  • There is the possibility of calling them the RG3s after all RGIII is the franchise.
  • How about taking a number, after all the 49ers have a long history of winning football. Why not call the team the Washington 17 Trillions? The problem with this name is the team will have to change what they are called every year (as long as Obama is president).
  • The press is big industry in Washington, what about changing the team's name to The President's Butt-Kissers. Nah to soft to be football.
 Note to Chuck Hagel, if the Redskins is offensive-- your suggestion of The Jewish Lobby, wont work either.

There is one more option. There are teams with the name of an occupation associated with the city...like the Dallas Cowboys. Using that method the football team could be called the  Ridiculously PC City Councils

9 comments:

RAM said...

How about calling the team the Red Menace? This has been present in DC on and off for some time, so it should be familiar.

srhcb said...

The DC PC

Doug Welch said...

The Debt
The Pansies
CONgress Critters

Anonymous said...

The Filibusterers!
The Washington Imperialists

The Washington Thieves, Brigands, Pickpockets, Bandits, Jihadis, Anti-Americans, Anti-Christs, Devils, Democrats, Jacobins, Guillotines, Communists, Cheka, or Red Terror

Redterror is incredibly appropriate

MDB said...

Washington Astroturfs

aristotlegoopop said...

The Babykillers.

Anonymous said...

How about the Elizabeth Warrens?

BlueCollarMuse said...

I like Beagle's The Red Terror ...

But with wicked mad props to Ms. Rand, we could call them the Looters, the Moochers or perhaps the softer the Mouches.

The Do Nothings or the Know Nothings come to mind.

The Can Kickers has possibilities. Especially since it might be mistaken for the tougher sounding @$$ Kickers and not the folks passing the buck to future generations by kicking the can down the road.

All in all, there are any number of location appropriate names for the team. Still and all, I prefer to leave them the RedSkins. If for no other reason than poking the PC Police in the eye yet again.

Anonymous said...

The Time Serving Drones pops to mind. Or even just The Drones -- they could fly a drone across the field at half time and fire a rocket at the opposing teams locker room.

I think someone already suggested this, but just to make sure how about The Bureaucrats?

If the murder rate is as high in DC as it is in most gun-free cities, The Dead Victims or The Dead Citizens might be worth a thought.

Rights might be a problem, but for a while there was a band called The Dead Kennedy's.

I'll stop here, at least for now.