Climate Fear Mongering: Global Warming Will Lead To Fewer Attractive Women And/Or Guys

The global warming enthusiasts are going out of the way to convince men of the veracity of their hypothesis, and to be honest this time they are hitting below the belt.  If you believe the latest reports global warming will lead to a dearth of attractive women.

Earlier this week, well-known scholar of the beauty arts Tyra Banks wrote a piece in the Wall Street Journal about beauty in the future. She said that global warming will cause women to lose their "womanly" figures:

Global warming will threaten our crops so natural food will be scarce. Hourglass, curvy bodies will be the aspirational beauty standard, representing that those women have access to bounties of fulfilling yet healthy food, which means they are affluent.

Do you have a thing for Redheads? Did you watch Zero Dark Forty fifty times just to see Jessica Chastain?  Well the global warming theorists have some bad news for you, redheads could become extinct as a result of Global Warming.

The gene that causes red hair is thought to be an evolutionary response to the lack of sunlight.

Dr Alistair Moffat, boss of genetic testing company ScotlandsDNA, said:

“We think red hair in Scotland, Ireland and the north of England is adaptation to the climate. We do not get enough sun and have to get all the vitamin D we can.

However, the figure could fall dramatically – and even see redheads die out completely in a few centuries – if predictions that the country’s climate is set to become much sunnier are true.

Dr Alistair Moffat, boss of genetic testing company ScotlandsDNA, said: “We think red hair in Scotland, Ireland and the north of England is adaptation to the climate. We do not get enough sun and have to get all the vitamin D we can.

“If it was to get less cloudy and there was more sun, there would be fewer people carrying the gene.”

Another scientist, who asked not to be named because of the theoretical nature of the work, said: “I think the gene is slowly dying out. Climate change could see a decline in the number of people with red hair in Scotland.”

Not just Scotland but all over the world. Beyond looks according to some Congressional Progressives women will become less attractive because they will become hookers (pear-shaped non red headed hookers I would imagine).

A resolution put forward by Rep. Barbara Lee, D-Calif., and a dozen other House Democrats claims that global warming could drive women to prostitution, The Hill reported Monday. According to Democrats, climate change will affect women worse than men and could force poor women into the sex trade.

"[F]ood insecure women with limited socioeconomic resources may be vulnerable to situations such as sex work, transactional sex, and early marriage that put them at risk for HIV, STIs, unplanned pregnancy, and poor reproductive health," the resolution says.

Democrats also claim that changes in the climate will put added stress on female farmers and will hurt "marginalized" women like refugees, sexual minorities, adolescent girls, and women and girls with HIV.

Wow! Non red-headed pear-shaped women who turn tricks, those climate change folks have an active imagination.

But Guys, I wouldn't worry about the women because you are going to have bigger problems than the way women look. As a matter of fact if you believe the global warming moonbats, no woman is going to have the desire to go near the average man,  who is predicted to be an incontinent, impotent bald guy with extra hair growing from his toes.

A recent study by the National Institute of Scientific Research in Brussels has finally brought to an end the debate that has raged for many years about whether global warming is the leading cause of erectile dysfunction.

“The evidence is clear! All statistics confirm it, but most scientists would not believe it. However, the data is irrefutable ! ” said Dr. Alfvin Schwartz , Chief of the study. ” Global warming makes it go numb! There is no other way to say it ” he explains with conviction.

Other recent studies have confirmed that global warming could cause baldness, incontinence and the growth of hair between the toes, but the link with erectile dysfunction had not yet been certified by a credible institution until today.

Reading these fear stories make me very happy that I am married and off the market. They also make me happy about the sexiest picture on this post, the one that shows there has been no Global Warming for 17 years and 10 months, which means no one has to worry about fewer attractive women in the world.