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Friday, September 25, 2009

Little Green Footballs "Jumps The Frog" But it WASN'T HIS FAULT

Charles Johnson the Despot of Little Green Footballs fell victim to the story yesterday. To prove a point on his TV show the other day Glenn Beck threw a rubber frog into boiling water. The next day the "Monitor" and the left-handed side of the internet whined that Beck Killed a REAL FROG. Beck explains what happened in the video below (if you can't see the video click here):



At first glance it seemed as if Charles Johnson flew off the handle just like most days when Johnson forgets to take his medication, he couldn't wait to attack someone he disagreed with. It was assumed that in this case his irrational anger forced him to go after the Fox Broadcaster. But that is not what happened.




After some digging it was discovered that Johnson did not learn about the Beck incident from the liberal bloggers or the Christian Science Monitor. He was forced into writing his Frog Killer article because he got this strange EMAIL  from Nigeria of all places:
CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA
TINUBU SQUARE, LAGOS NIGERIA
OFFICE OF THE FOREIGN OPERATIONS DEPT
EMAIL: TheJewNBClike@yahoo.co.jp
TEL: 234-80-37226647


Dear: Charles Johnson,Diktator
Little Green Footballs


PART PAYMENT NOTIFICATION OF US$10.5M.
I am Dr.David Bello, Director, Foreign operations dept Central bank of Nigeria my office monitors and controls the affairs of all banks and financial institutions in Nigeria concerned with foreign claim payments and dead Amphibians.


I am the final signatory to any transfer of huge funds moving within banks both on the local and international levels in line with foreign claim settlement.I also monitor crazy TV Hosts and racist bloggers such as Atlas Shrugs the Lizard Killer, Michelle Malkin (who is not only a racist but also a  RAAAAAAAAACIST! ), RS "The Other" McCain , Robert "Jihad Watcher" Spencer, and Yid With Lid. We believe the last one is the worst of all because he believes that life begins when the kids move out of the house and the Mini-Van dies.


I have before my list of funds, which could not be transferred to some nominated accounts as these accounts have been identified either as, unclaimed deposits and over-invoiced sum etc. Your Name was brought up as someone who might fall for any type of scam, who could use the money for some electro-shock therapy, so we can help you get funds  transferred to your bank account.


As it is my duty to recommend the transfer of these surplus funds to the Federal Government Treasury and Reserve Accounts as unclaimed deposits, I have the opportunity to write you based on the instructions I received from the Foreign reconciliation dept to submit the List of payment reports/ expenditures and audited reports of revenues.


At this juncture, We wish to inform you that your part payment of US$10.5M has been approved through international certified band draft, payable in our escrow account with our correspondence bank in CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA


You are hereby advice to reconfirm your contacts info and receiving bank details to enable us send an immediate telex message to JP morgan new york for the clearance of your approved fund through our account with the Jp morgan new york to your designated bank account.


This office will forward to you a copy of your certified bank draft as soon as we hear from you with all of your savings account information so it could be confirmed through your local bank. Also to confirm that you are honest about working with us, we need to have you show your loyalty.  You must publish on your website something really idiotic, that no one with half a brain would believe. Like Glen Beck boiled a frog alive on TV, something so out there that everybody would know it wasn't true.


reply back to me through my alternative E-mail: dr_davidbellocbn2009@yahoo.co.jp


BEST REGARDS.
DR KEITH OLBERMANN
DIRECTOR, FOREIGN OPERATIONS DEPT.
CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA

3 comments:

GeronL said...

I have gotten a few strange Nigerian emails in my time.
That might have been the most interesting. =o)

Robert Stacy McCain said...

Damn, Sammy, that was so good, I had to steal it!

You got yourself an FMJA for that.

Findalis said...

I hate to tell you this but life DOES begin when the kids move out, the minivan dies, and you don't care about the PTA or School Board.

WHAT A LIFE THEN!!!!!!!!!